With the month of May a couple of hard truths rolled forward concerning the often-difficult task of saying goodbye to friends you’ve known and grown very fond of over the years. One such farewell was luckily stretched over a series of approximately 5 separate going away parties, which was a blessing because if you are like me, you’re going to miss the ever pleasant, brilliantly subversive, single-handed torch-bearer of the true avant garde in the SF drag scene, Phatima Rude, as she is pulling up stakes and boldly taking herself and all that fire and music and magic to New York City. Having snagged a job doing make-up and costumes for the NY-based production of Hedwig that has taken up residency at the Victorian Theater for the past few months, Phatima has had a perfect opportunity to shine as the incredible artist she is. Having done make-up for local television stations and of course to stunning effect on herself night after night for years of innovative looks, Phatima was more than ready to handle her first major theatrical production, and the experience has clearly put a spring in her step and a sense of adventure enough to take her vast talents to the next logical place, New York City. She confided in me that she doesn’t have a job lined up and isn’t exactly sure what she’ll do but I have a feeling New York is more than ready to embrace the entity we’ve known and loved for so long.
Phatima has been making the scene here in SF for years, excelling in a realm of drag that always busted the proverbial seams of the basic exaggerated emulation of females we are all so used to. Phatima’s approach to drag often incorporated elements of modern primitivism and body manipulations, like stuffing her ample roundness into an impossibly tight, organ displacing corset or stretching the holes in her notorious earlobes wide enough to accommodate a jar of Carmex lip balm, or wearing those eerie contact lenses that make your eyes look demonic or animal like, all elements that would cause me to wince imagining the pain or just look away because it freaked me out (to date I cant look at anyone wearing those weird contacts). Phatima’s looks and transformations are seemingly endless and totally innovative. I’ve seen her completely painted blue as a Hindu goddess, or working the developmental stages in the finest of Freudian flair with a host of toddler and infant wear to spark a certain perverse response in our youth-obsessed culture (once at burning man Phatima’s personal sleeping area was a child’s playpen), she’s strolled by my home dressed as a pink poodle, a scary clown, a dominatrix, a hilariously geriatric version of drag superstar Juanita More for Come-as- your-favorite-Tranny Shack-character-night, and a host of full on white trash influenced looks so authentic I’d do a double-take thinking some poor soul had lost her way to the Ladies of the Moose Lodge meeting. I believe I’ve seen her do a dead-on perfect Divine before, as well as some variations on shock rockers like Marilyn Manson (whom she loves), and some ghoulish Hell Raiser-esque cenobite creations. Some of my favorite things she does tend to be more on the simple but cruel side, like when she finds a too-small pair of seven inch heels and jams her feet into them as hard as possible then removes the heel completely and walks around like that all night, or her creative incorporation of prosthetic limbs and back braces and other correctional gear into outfits. As far as drag goes, she’s got more in common with the late great Leigh Bowery than she does with RuPaul. Phatima is a walking work of art, it’s difficult to recall each and every inspired stroke of genius she’s donned to head out and greet the night but you can always count on more and more. I’ve always felt to a certain extent that with the passing of the brilliant artist and freak figure Jerome Caja many years ago, Phatima sort of carried on with his unstoppable spirit as a symbol of a certain punk anarchy freak subculture that used to flourish here about a decade ago.
At any rate, Phatima is leaving San Francisco but she tells me that she anticipates a pretty bi-coastal existence as she has such a distinct sense that San Francisco is her home, and you never want to leave your home forever. This is very good news for those of us who will miss her always brilliant, outrageous, humorous and loving presence. Once Phatima told me that when she visits New York for the first time she planned to dress exactly like Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast At Tiffany’s the opening scene and go to that very location and re-enact the scene repeatedly. Well, her arrival to New York this month will be her first visit. I hope she does go through with her plan, but one way or another Phatima, the genius, the legend, the pagan hoax, will definitely make an entrance. I wish her the best of luck and warn her to expect visitors.
The other goodbye many of us had to face recently isn’t as happy a departure as someone just relocating unfortunately. On April 19th a dear friend to many, devoted wife and mother and a vivacious, beautiful and funny girl, Nonnie Heath died unexpectedly. I’ve known Nonnie for many years, having first met at club Chaos and Club Uranus. Nonnie was often the pretty and tough looking girl who could definitely keep up and hold her own with the boys, seeming to generally surround herself with mostly hedonistic creative art-fag types. It seemed that meeting Nonnie and hanging out for awhile was all it really took to be forever linked to her, like she was a part of you and vice versa, a devoted friend who would always be there with you and sympathize and call you on your shit if necessary. As time went on I was really thrilled when Nonnie became involved in the Sick and Twisted Players. She would often help out behind the scenes and then started taking on roles onstage. I just recalled that, like Phatima, Nonnie also painted herself completely blue once to play the role of Smurfette in an all star one night only performance of Snow White and The Seven Dwarves in My Bloody Valentine—an amalgamation of the coal mining horror movie cast with a multitude of cartoon characters. My favorite show with Nonnie was The Poseidon Adventure. There was a noted chemistry present between her and I in the casting meeting so we were cast as brother and sister, Robin and Susan Shelby. Our big scene called for Nonnie’s character to slap me and every single performance she really did slap me, none of that stage-slap trickery. At her recent memorial we actually watched videotapes of her shows and I was amazed by how great she was on stage, a natural with great comic timing and turn it on turn it off sex appeal. She played a lot of other roles in various shows but she curtailed working with the S&T Players at a certain point to prepare for her finest role ever, motherhood. Her beautiful son Tristan was clearly her best work to date and motherhood was a role she took to unlike any other. Nonnie and her husband Ben and Tristan were a perfect nuclear family, something many of us would have never expected or anticipated coming from the likes of us and our friends but Nonnie and Ben rose to the occasion.
She was a great mother and Tristan turned out to be a delightful and extra bright child and he truly seemed to adore and dote on his mother. She delighted in the fact that she had produced such an innocent and loving creature, someone who smiled and said sweet things for no other reason than to do just that. Her many jaded gay friends were frequently amazed by this wonder child, so warm and well behaved. He refreshed in our minds something we’d forgotten about, something like unconditional love.
Tristan is now seven years old and faces a life without his mother but not without his and our shared memories of Nonnie, which I only hope we’ll be able to share with him for many years to come because Nonnie Heath was an unforgettable person who touched so many lives with her firey toughness her grace and beauty and her unwavering devotion to Ben, Tristan and the many others she held dear. She’ll always be a part of us, a great friend and a person I’m lucky and proud to have known.